Lost All Sense of Purpose

And through the dearth, I’ve come to learn to just ignore my instincts My staunch reactance folds in back upon itself and breaks The torturous decades of complete dependance has left its imprint My self worth’s been so ruptured - my sadness mutates into self-hate It’s hard to justify - when on paper it all seems to be alright Stacked layers of guilt, unveiling new reasons to feel bad So I’ve now stopped searching, for every time, a new torture comes to light With what I’ve got, and with what I had - Lost all sense of purpose I can’t talk to anyone - they all suggest to “get to the bottom” of this. But I’ve dug so far I’ve fallen straight into hell I’ve given up on all that once excited me and brought me joy I’m but a husk, an abandoned shell - Lost all sense of purpose