Shattered Memory of a Lost Love

I spend my days wilting away in an empty bed your love for me has died yet I can't unlove you it seems all this time meant nothing there wasn't any point to any of it now I'm stuck with a sense of emptiness that will never leave my chest each day I face new mental struggles unable to leave the bed unable to shower or eat there's no point to living anymore trying to let go of my feelings but deep down I know I will always love you I will leave for good cut my wrists tie the noose it didn't work last time but I'll try again in nights of utter darkness you picked me back up held me in your arms kissed me on the forehead and held my hands now I must accept all that has gone what we had, what we were was anything you said even true? was it all just a lie? was I ever even special to you? did I not love enough? did I love too much? is it something I did? was I not pretty enough? spiralling out of control the roses I had once left for you remain wilted and dead the poem I wrote for you remains unheard and bittersweet you're in my veins in my head, you're in my mind I need you out I wish I didn't feel a thing cut my wrists separate my mind cut open my veins please let me go please, I want to live I want to breathe again I want to breathe again... I guess in the end I will never be the one for you and although I was never special to you you were always special to me