Anhedonia

no longer do I feel what I used to no longer do I long to be alive my heart still beats but what lives within me is no longer alive darkness engulfs me desperate to drown I let everything go my body has grown cold my lips turned blue I will only wither without you joy has died in all I used to do life has gotten so dull and grey pick up the pieces my body yearns for something more than I will ever be and in this life I will release all of my misery I still feel you in these walls breathing down my neck but you have left so long ago and my time has come to embrace my demise sitting alone on the shower floor knife in my hands listening out to the birds there is no joy in what I used to enjoy time to leave this wretched place that stains my memory lying lifeless my skin has gone cold you let me in but I slipped away I loved you but I was never enough